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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27252874">My Knight In Shining Armor</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerwhore/pseuds/flowerwhore'>flowerwhore</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Ratched (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bad Writing, F/F, Past Abuse, Sexual Assault, gwendolyn is a knight in shining armor, homophobic slur, hurt/comfort after dont worry, i am 14, im so mean to mildred, oh wait-, sounds like a 14 year old wrote this</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 00:34:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,946</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27252874</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerwhore/pseuds/flowerwhore</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where Mildred is sexually assaulted at a bar and Gwen saves her.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gwendolyn Briggs/Mildred Ratched</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>113</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>My Knight In Shining Armor</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>In advance just in case you missed the tags :</p><p>TW: sexual assault , homophobic slur, past abuse</p><p>Please, please, please don't read if you get triggered by things like this. It wasn't very graphic because I was a little afraid to write something like this if I'm being honest. </p><p>I also apologize in advance. I haven't written fanfiction in like two years, so I'm really out of practice, AND it's my first time ever using Archive of My Own as a writing platform. (I've read from it before and everything)</p><p> I might continue Mildred's after effects of the assault and how that ties in with her past abuse/sexual abuse. I feel like I didn't do justice of the after effects of what happened.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was too hot. Stuffy even. Mildred slipped off her ivory gloves and grimaced. But she turned to Gwendolyn who laughed and beamed. She decided it was worth it. Anything for her. </p><p>Gwen had suggested the night before that they should go out together, but not just at hidden gay bars. </p><p>“In public?” Mildred said nervously.</p><p>Gwen shifted to her side to face Mildred, they were lying in bed, “Yes, I<em> know </em>. It’s okay if you don’t want to go, but…”</p><p>Mildred bit her lower lip, “But?”</p><p>Gwen put her hand on Mildred’s thigh, “I just wish we went out together without having to hide what we have. It’s not fair.”</p><p>Mildred couldn’t say no to that. So she kissed the blond, longer than intended, and said yes.</p><p>Gwen was laughing and talking to some hetero couple who was sitting across from them in a booth. Mildred smiled whenever the table erupted into laughter, but she couldn’t pay attention when the man across from her kept eyeing her strangely.</p><p>“So I take it you two are abandoning your husbands for the night?” He said jokingly, slinging his arm around Marissa(his girlfriend).</p><p>Mildred shot a look to Gwen who shook her head, smiled, and replied, “Actually, we’re together.”</p><p>Charles widened his eyes and looked up and down at Mildred slowly. Mildred gulped.</p><p>“That’s a shame.” Charles said, looking at Mildred.</p><p>His eyes felt familiar to her. Like the predators who watched her on the stage. Mildred felt herself tense up and she broke the gaze she had with him.</p><p>“Oh shut up Charles! It’s adorable. I never see any lesbos around these parts.” Marissa squealed and hugged Charles.</p><p>Mildred let out a breath of relief and took a sip of her martini. She felt her hand being squeezed from under the table as reassurance. She squeezed back. </p><p>Marissa leaned forward, her long curly blond hair spilling over her shoulder, and put out an arm on the table, “You know, my best friend back in college used to be lesbian.”</p><p>Mildred nodded uncomfortably, “Oh really?”</p><p>Marissa smiled, “Yes well, I thought you might know her. Her name’s Gloria. Gloria Lesmond.”</p><p>Mildred laughed slightly and looked to Gwen jokingly, “How would <em> we </em> know your friend?”</p><p>Marissa shrugged, “I don’t know, don’t you lesbos all have a group thing going on?”</p><p>Mildred nearly choked on her martini. Gwen tried to stifle a laugh. </p><p>However, the blond across from the lesbians didn’t seem to know what was going on. She sneezed heartily and noticed a makeup blotch on her coat.</p><p>“Charles, I’m gonna go powder my nose. Would any of you gals like to accompany me to the restroom?”  Marissa said standing up to move past Charles.</p><p>Mildred shook her head, but to her surprise Gwen stood up also.</p><p>“I’ll come along with you,” Gwen said and looked to Mildred when she felt a slight tug on her hand.</p><p>“I won’t be long, you’ll survive without me won’t you? And besides, Charles is here.” Gwen said nonchalantly and picked up her pace to catch up with Marissa.</p><p>Mildred dropped her hand from Gwen’s, nodding, and faced the steely green eyed man in front of her. He watched the two ladies walk to the =restroom and when they were out of sight, he got up to sit next to Mildred. Mildred backed up against the wall. He slid in and took a seat a little to close for Mildred’s liking.</p><p>“You know you don’t have to sit next-” </p><p>Charles placed an arm around Mildred, “I know.”</p><p> Suddenly, she got very nervous when she realized no one could see her from this angle in the bar. She shrank in his touch. Mildred never liked when men touched her. Especially if they had other intentions.</p><p>“So, you’re a dyke?” He said, eyes flicking from her eyes to her chest that she chose to expose slightly for the occasion. </p><p>Mildred shifted uncomfortably in her seat and pulled her coat around her chest, “No, I’m a woman in love.”</p><p>Charles scoffed and twirled his finger around Mildred’s hem. She wore a dress today, a shorter one right below the knee. His hand slowly lifted up the end of her dress, so it rested on the mid thigh.</p><p>“What are you doing?” Mildred let out a nervous laugh at the end.</p><p><em> Gwendolyn wouldn’t like this </em>, Mildred thought as Charles played with a lock of red hair with his other hand.</p><p>He placed his pale hand on Mildred’s thigh and Mildred jumped at the contact. He scooted in closer and Mildred backed up against the wall, back pressed.</p><p>“Charles, don’t put-” Mildred said, trying to move his heavy hand from her thigh.</p><p>“You know, Marissa said that sometimes it’s a phase. Maybe I can help you with that.” He whispered, trailing his hand under her dress now and moving higher. </p><p>Mildred swallowed, terrified, and tried to remove his hand once again more firmly. However her small hand had no effect on the rougher one moving up her thighs.</p><p>“Get your hand <em> off </em> of me.” Mildred said, but her voice was shaky and quiet and had no effect on the man currently violating her.</p><p>“Just...cooperate, Milly.” He said as he leaned in to whisper in her ear and slip his hand into her panties.</p><p>Mildred’s whole body went into shock and froze. <em> Milly </em> . She hadn’t heard her name being called like that since...since when Edmund and her were forced to <b> <em>perform</em> </b>. </p><p>
  <em> Hold still,  Milly!  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> It’ll be fast. Don’t worry. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Just...cooperate. </em>
</p><p>Mildred started to shake and tried to push off the stronger man. But it was no use, the man was so much stronger than her. Mildred couldn’t move. <em> MILDRED MOVE! MOVE! PUSH HIM OFF OF YOU! </em>But Mildred couldn’t do anything but let the man touch all around her. She felt herself shake and the tears rolled down on her cheeks. She felt useless. She was letting herself be violated. This was her fault. </p><p>
  <em> Your fault. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Your fault. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Your faul- </em>
</p><p>He groped her thighs harshly and slipped his hand under the hem of her dress and her bra to handle her boobs. His hands felt like sandpaper against her soft skin. It colored her skin purple and blue from the harshness of his grip. He groped her breasts harder, and Mildred felt his erection pressed up against her hips. She felt herself gag and nausea set in.  </p><p>“Good girl. So submissive. Just the way I like my women. Marissa isn’t as good as you.” He seethed into her ear.</p><p>She shuddered at his words.  Mildred tried squirming and cried harder when she felt him grab her nipple. She yelped at the contact and forced herself to push the man’s shoulder’s away with her arms. But he stayed pressed against her, moaning at what his hands were doing.</p><p>Mildred shook and memories came flooding back. Suddenly Charles’s face had morphed into Edmund’s and they were on a stage. She was back on <em> the </em> stage and she felt dozens of eyes watching her. Mildred couldn’t be here. She couldn’t breathe. She felt her chest tighten up and the tears coming down harsher.</p><p> </p><p> <em> Gwen. </em></p><p> </p><p>Would she have thought Mildred was cheating on her? But Mildred was too scared to think about that at the moment so she blurted out the first words that came out of her mouth.</p><p> </p><p>“GWENDOLYN! GWEN!” Mildred shouted before Charles slapped his hand around her mouth.</p><p>“Shut up bitch!” Charles whispered harshly, his hand quickly coming out from her dress and on to her arm to hold her down.</p><p>Mildred turned rigid and hoped to God that Gwendolyn heard.</p><p>~</p><p>Gwendolyn laughed and started to put her powder back into her purse when she heard someone call her name. Her smile dropped. It was the voice that woke her up every morning with a soft kiss to her temple. Gwen shoved her powder into her purse, not caring if she left her brush behind and ran through the bathroom door. Her heart thumped in her chest, adrenaline now pumping through her.</p><p>“Gwendolyn? Where ya going?” She heard Marissa call out behind her. </p><p>Gwen didn’t care. She heard Mildred’s cry, even if it was faint. She pushed her way through the crowd of people, stepping on toes and getting shouted at. She knew something was wrong. She felt it in her gut. </p><p>When she finally got to their booth, her heart dropped and all she saw was <em> red </em> , <em> hot </em> , <strong><em> rage </em></strong>.</p><p>Mildred was backed up against the wall crying with Charles clearly touching her in ways that a lady shouldn’t be touched with a hand slapped across her mouth. She didn’t even hesitate to slam her purse against Charles’ head. </p><p>“What the-” Charles said, before Gwendolyn had pulled him off of a shaking Mildred by his cheap suit collar.   </p><p>Mildred gasped for air as she watched Gwen wind up her right fist and Charles slowly turn to face Gwendolyn. It was in slow-motion when her fist, which Mildred never knew a tiny fist could pack such a punch, made harsh contact with Charles’ nose. </p><p>
  <em> Crack! </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Thud! </em>
</p><p>Then a stream of curses. The whole bar went quiet and a crowd quickly formed around the booth in the corner. Gwen shook out her fist as she went in for more but was held back by another woman. Marissa came running in, pushing people out of the way, and screamed when she saw Charles on the ground. She dropped down and started caressing the man’s broken nose. He groaned and muttered countless slurs, too vile to understand. She shot Mildred a death look, not even noticing  Gwen’s bruised hand.</p><p>“What the <em> fuck </em> did you do?” Marissa shouted, venom dripping from her voice.</p><p>Mildred was still crying from what had happened earlier and couldn’t spit out a word while shaking. Her red hair was ruffled up and her coat was no longer covering her. The hem of her dress was moved up to her thighs and mascara was running down her face. </p><p>She felt so...exposed. Touched in places she never wanted to be touched with eyes watching  that she never wanted watching.</p><p>The angry woman stood up and grabbed Mildred’s shoulders. Mildred flinched sharply at the contact, doe eyes looking up terrified at the clearly angry woman. </p><p>With every word, Marissa shook Mildred harshly, “What. Did. You. DO. BITCH.”</p><p>Mildred started crying harder and tried to say, “I- I didn- sorry-”</p><p>Marissa raised a hand to slap Mildred.  Mildred flinched, used to this kind of behavior from the past. She braced herself for impact, holding her hands up to shield her face. But the impact never came. She looked up through her fingers  to see Gwen holding Marissa’s hand, looking more angrier than she’s ever seen her.</p><p>“What the hell Gwen?” Marissa yelled, trying to get loose of Gwen’s grip.</p><p>But Gwen didn’t release her hand and instead twisted it backwards, resulting in an “AhhhAh” from the younger woman.</p><p>“Don’t you <em> ever </em>lay a hand on my girlfriend.” Gwen said stealy eyes, firm grip and stance ready.</p><p>The crowd erupted into whispers at the word “girlfriend”.</p><p>Marissa looked in confusion and anger, “Why the fu-”</p><p>“He had Mildred underneath him, doing god knows what to her without consent. Did you see her? She’s crying, exposed, HE did that to her.” Gwen yelled, but Mildred could hear her voice shaking from anger.</p><p>It scared her a little bit. To see Gwen like this. Full rage. Mildred wondered if Gwen was mad at her also...for cheating. She started to shake harder in fear. She didn’t like angry Gwen.</p><p>Marissa gawked and shook her head. Gwen released her hand.</p><p>“He wouldn’t- Charles would never…” Marissa put a hand to her mouth looking quite confused.</p><p>“Oh <em> fuck </em> off Marissa. ” Gwen said and went over to grab Mildred.</p><p>Mildred flinched at the contact and Gwen’s heart broke. She wondered what Charles did to Mildred. Gwen swallowed at the thought, too disturbing to think about. She slowly enveloped Mildred into her arms. Mildred sunk into Gwen, trying to avoid the stares of the bar. They quickly made their way out of the bar before hearing the f slur of a man’s voice. <em> Charles </em>.</p><p>Gwendolyn kissed the hurt redhead on the forehead, walking across the gravel with an arm slung around her. Mildred trembled in her touch, trying to pull down her dress while walking.</p><p>“It’s okay. I have you. You’re safe.” She whispered, trying not to cry herself.</p><p>Mildred sobbed.</p><p>~</p><p>They were driving home in the rain, the coastline. Mildred had stopped crying. Her body ached from exhaustion and the harsh touching. She felt the bruises ripen on her body. She didn’t feel like talking either when Gwendolyn had asked her if she was alright. If she wanted to talk about...what happened. </p><p>She didn’t.</p><p>But it was too quiet and the radio had stopped working due to the storm. All they could hear was the pattering of raindrops against the car’s metal. Mildred glanced at Gwendolyn. She was focused on the road, careful not to hydroplane. She was angry, worried...Mildred saw her brows furrow and her lips curve down whenever she looked back at her.</p><p>Was...was she mad at her? Did Mildred cheat on Gwendolyn? Was that why she was so angry?</p><p>Tears sprang to Mildred’s eyes at the thought of it and she felt herself getting red. She turned her gaze back to the window so Gwendolyn couldn’t see her face. She tried to blink back the tears and breathe calmly.</p><p>She had to ask. She didn’t want Gwendolyn to be mad at her forever. Her fingers clasped together and she kept eyes down.</p><p>“Gwendolyn?”</p><p>She tried her best to keep her voice steady.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>Mildred wasn’t sure what kind of “yes” that was.</p><p>“Are you mad at me?” Mildred blurted out, a crack at the last syllable.</p><p>Gwen stopped the car abruptly and Mildred felt the tears coming down and herself tense up. She didn’t dare turn her gaze to her partner. Gwendolyn turned her entire body towards Mildred, but before she could even open her mouth-</p><p>“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean-” She hiccuped and put her face in her hands, red hair spilling over. “- for it to happen. It was my fau-fault.”</p><p>Mildred continued on not even paying attention to Gwendolyn, “I <em> knew </em> I should’ve dressed modestly, but I wanted to...to give you a nice view.”</p><p>Mildred started to hiccup and cried harder into her palms. She felt the tears and her makeup smudge but she didn’t care. Suddenly she felt a warm hand on her back and she looked up to her left.</p><p>Gwendolyn was crying. Why was she crying?</p><p>“Oh god, Mildred.” Gwen wiped her tears, “None of this is your fault. None of it.”</p><p>Mildred shook her head, “I <em> cheated </em> on you. I can’t even- ….I’m sorry.”</p><p>“<em> Mildred </em>.” Gwendolyn said firmly and Mildred had stopped hiccuping. She stopped breathing for a second too.</p><p>The blond sighed, “God, I’m sorry. Just- listen. You didn’t cheat on me, Mildred. It’s not your fault. Charles-”</p><p>Mildred shuddered at his name.</p><p>“He hurt you. Okay? You didn’t want any of this to happen. The way you dressed doesn’t excuse his actions. None of this is cheating! Mildred...it’s okay.” Gwen said her voice strained.</p><p>Suddenly Mildred felt a weight lifted off her back and let out a small, “So you’re not mad at me?”</p><p>Gwendolyn reached out her arms, bending over the stick shift, and cupped her face.</p><p>“No. I love you, Mildred.”</p><p>Mildred let out a small squeak of an, “You do?”</p><p>Gwendolyn traced her fingers under Mildred’s eyes, wet from tears, “So much, Mildred, so much.”</p><p>Mildred felt new tears being produced, different ones. </p><p>“...you know, it scared me to see you like that.”</p><p>“Like what?” Gwen asked.</p><p><br/>“Angry.” Mildred said, voice small.</p><p> </p><p>Gwendolyn’s heart broke. She never expected Mildred to feel like that. The last thing she wanted was for Mildred feeling afraid of her. Gwendolyn was supposed to be Mildred’s safe haven. What if Mildred felt like she could no longer trust Gwendolyn? </p><p>Gwendolyn spoke slowly, “I would never, ever, harm you like that. I’d never be angry at you like that, Mildred. I’ve been angry before, but never like that. I’d never harm you.”</p><p>The blond hesitated before speaking again.</p><p>“Do you know how much it hurt? To see you like that? To see him...<em> violating </em> you?” Gwendolyn said, her voice cracking at ‘violating’.</p><p>Mildred felt a rock in her throat appear, “It hurts. I feel…”</p><p>Gwendolyn nodded lovingly, like she knew Mildred wanted permission to speak even though she didn’t need too.</p><p>“Exposed. I didn’t want him doing those things to me, Gwen. He touched me in places only I wanted you to touch.” Mildred cried, she ached inside.</p><p>Gwendolyn felt a pain being released into her body at her words. </p><p>“I wish I had never left you alone.”</p><p>Mildred shook her head and wiped her tears, “It’s not your fault Gwen. You saved me.”</p><p>Gwendolyn let out a chuckle and sniffed, “I’m your knight in shining armor huh?”</p><p>Mildred forced a  laugh and bit her lip to stop from crying. The older woman clocked that and moved her hand under Mildred’s jaw.</p><p>“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay. I’m here. You’re okay now.”</p><p>Mildred let out a huff of exasperation and tears. Gwendolyn brought Mildred’s face closer to her chest. Mildred laid her head against Gwen’s heart beat, hearing the pattern. She placed a hand on Mildred’s head, cradling her.  Mildred whimpered at the contact, never really getting used to the feeling of being loved.</p><p>
  <em> Loved. </em>
</p><p>           She was loved.</p><p> </p><p>                            “I love you Gwendolyn.”</p>
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